Extra Ordinary Ideas

Call Rejection

Every market liberal should be allowed one heterodoxy. Mine is telemarketers. I absolutely hate them. Telemarketers should be rounded up, denied their procedural due process rights, and shipped to Guantanamo Bay to room with Al-Qaeda.

While a solution truly commensurate with the gravity of their offense isn’t on the horizon just yet, the FTC recently announced plans for a national do-not-call list, to which hapless Americans can add their names with a single call to a toll free number. Subsequent calls to such escapees will be federal offenses, hopefully punishable under sentencing guidelines that mention thumbscrews and shock treatments.

At least one telemarketing company has already found religion. WAPO reported on Saturday that CyberRep has cancelled its last cold-calling contract, opting instead to take inbound calls from customers who actually want to speak to them. “It is our belief that the world of outbound telemarketing has a terminal illness and is dying,” a company executive explained.

Remaining perpetrators should convert fast. The national program – and federal penalties – will be online within months. A national “do not call” list is the latest unwarranted federal regulatory intrusion into essentially non-coercive market activity. And I can’t wait…

UPDATE: The agony of disappointment! I knew it was too good to be true. The Associated Press now reports that the House Energy and Commerce Committee is holding up funding authority for the FTC’s “do not call” registry under heavy lobbying from the Direct Marketing Association. Afraid to oppose the list, Committee members say they want to “study” the plan for the indefinite future.

This calls to mind a recent conversation – related here by Julian – about the power of large organizations to influence the political system in favor of personally beneficial policies, the costs of which are then disbursed among the rest of us. Standard public choice economics, to be sure. The twist? We almost convinced ourselves that widely held corporations may suffer from similar incentive problems. Efficient markets don’t require this type of FTC regulation, you say? Oh, don't argue with me just now. My inner fascist is squalling in dismay!